I love writing. There is nothing better than a day spent creating a new story, or even fixing a plot hole, as long as I’m writing in some capacity. I am lucky enough that this is my daily occupation as a full time writer and soon to be indie published author. I love everything about being a writer. But, some days, I feel like I just don’t measure up to the standard of a ‘real’ writer. I’ve been putting in hours of work trying to get my book, ‘The Crystal Tree’, finished, and I am making massive progress, which I’m really pleased with.But it still doesn’t always feel enough. I absolutely love what I do. But at the same time, there’s always that lingering feeling that maybe, if I tried a bit harder, I could write or edit a bit more, work on another project, or just get more done in my day. And that maybe that would make me more of a ‘real’ writer.
Logically, I know I’m working hard. When I write, I am focused, and I’m consistent. Every day I’m doing something to push myself one step closer to being finished. As long as I’ve actually worked instead of goofing off on YouTube or Twitter, then I’m going in the right direction. It can be hard to put the blinders on and not keep checking what everyone else is doing, measuring myself against the progress other people are making. I’m still tweaking and honing my system of production, and sometimes, I forget that there’s no ‘right’ amount that a writer has to achieve in their day. There is no standardised average amount of work we ought to be getting through every day to be a real writer. There is no comparing yourself to other people.
There’s not even any comparing me to myself, because every day is different, depending on how early I had to get up, how much I slept, what kind of chapter I’m working on, or what type of work I have planned to do for the day. I always feel i accomplished less on days when I’ve scheduled less writing, maybe because I value writing more highly than anything else I do. After all, that’s why I call myself a writer. There is no standard of writing, no amount that has to be achieved in a day. As long as I’m writing and putting my best effort in every time I sit down at the keyboard, isn’t that enough really?
I’m trying to combat this by taking each day as it happened and not comparing one day to another. It’s not about how much I got done. It’s about whether I put my best work in. Did I focus best I could? Did I need to take more breaks so that I could work better over the course of the day? Did I spend too much time procrastinating on Twitter (always a danger)? Most of all, did I enjoy myself? And did I give it my best effort, no matter what sort of day it was? In the end, I think that’s the only thing you need to keep track of. Because, in the end,writing is fun, and we are writers. and the only thing that is really required of us is that we show up, ready to do our best.,That’s what I’m trying to learn to remember more often. Because writing is what I love.
Am I alone in this, or have you ever felt this before too? I’d love to hear your thoughts on this. Leave me a comment and let’s chat!
